Thursday, April 06, 2006


Hubby and I are switching.....where we sleep that is.

Due to hubby's highly physically and mentally demanding job, I have round the clock baby care. He does not have to wake up in the wee hours to take care of Bubby. Besides, he can't breast feed anyway. :) When people scoff at this, I tell them I'd rather be tired than have a dead husband. He really needs his sleep. Besides, I can sleep during the day. Thankfully, I'm one of those people who can sleep just about any time just about anywhere. Especially now.

When Bubby came home from the hospital, hubby graciously let us have the master bedroom. We live in a 2 bedroom house. What is going to be Bubby's nursery is currently occupied by my brother who's staying here until he finishes college in May. Hubby slept in the living room.

After two weeks of this, I can see the toll it's taking on my husband. He's tired, sore and sorely misses sharing our bed. I also have a problem with staying awake in the bedroom when Bubby's awake. I don't know how many times I've accidentally fallen asleep while holding Bubby, only to wake up 2 or 3 hours later with him thankfully still in my arms and alive. I'm so afraid of SIDS.

So, as of tonight, hubby's moving back into the bedroom and Bubby and I are moving into the living room. I need access to the kitchen and bathroom anyway without disturbing hubby. Plus, I'll have access to the computer and DVD player should I need extra help staying up with Bubby (who thinks it's party time at 3 am). PLUS, when Bubby settles down for his 2 hours of sleep before the alarm goes off, I can feel safe leaving him in his cradle in the living room and go snuggle with hubby on the bed. Hubby will also get a better night's sleep on the bed. All bases covered!


Naomi said...

I think that is very nice and respectful of you. I know that your husband appreciates it very much.

Muriel said...

Hi Ladyscott,
why don't you try to put your baby just beside your bed (of course, if you have enough room to put the cradle there) so when he wakes up you just have to take him and nurse him, you even don't have to leave your bed. When it's done you just put him back in his craddle, your husband won't even notice that the baby woke up during the night.
You can "forget" the diaper change during the night, especially when you breadtfeed !
Trust me, it is not very good for hubby and you not to sleep together, don't do that for to long...
I used to do that way with my babies and it worked well (I did it 3 monthes for the 2 first, and 7 monthes with the last one...)
Forgive my poor english, I hope you understand it (I'm french)
God bless you and your family,

Candy said...

My hubby takes the night shift for the very first night, while I rest from labor (remember, I have my kids at home.)

From day two and beyond, the baby is my responsibility. Like you said, a husband can't breastfeed. :-)

I usually have the baby in a bassinet next to, or at the foot of the bed. When the baby woke up, I'd take him out to the living room, turn on the TV, and try to stay awake in my recliner while he nursed.

Then, I burped him, changed his diaper, and went back into the bedroom. Baby went back into his bassinet, and I climbed back into bed. :-)

I could pump into bottles, and let hubby feed the babies, but then if I missed more than a night's worth of nursing, my milk supply would go down. Plus, missing the night feedings would hurt. :-?

Sometimes my hubby would get up, and visit with me durring the wee hours when I was nursing, then he would take over the burping and diaper change, while I went back to bed.

However, hubby had to work the next day, so usually I had all night shifts all by myself. I didn't mind. It is so peaceful at 2am. :-)

PS - I demand feed when the baby is very young, until I start seeing a feeding patern. Then, I follow his feeding patern, and create a feeding schedule off of it. I then will feed the baby on the schedule. I would even wake him to feed him, if it were time.

However, at night, I won't wake a baby to feed him, I let him wake me. Becaues of this, my first was sleeping through the night at 4 months, my second at 9 weeks, and the same with my third. I wonder how my fourth is going to be? :-)

Anonymous said...

A live hubby beats a dead hubby anyday. Elly.

Anonymous said...

I don't understand this. Wouldn't your husband be more concerned with your comfort and the baby's than his own? Gee whiz... Regardless of how hard he works he has to be willing to make sacrifices at home too. Doesn't he want to slepp in the same room as his devoted wife and newborn baby?

TAS said...

Congratulations on your son!! I had noticed that you hadn't posted in a while...but never even thought that you might have already had the baby! I must say...I'm at 33 1/2 weeks right now, and my husband keeps pestering me to back my bags...after reading your story I think I'll go ahead and get prepared! Thanks for the motivation!! =)

Elly said...

To anonymous: "Due to hubby's highly physically and mentally demanding job, I have round the clock baby care." The owner of this blog obviously explains what you may not have 'grasped'. It may come as a shock to you and some others, but God's grace is sufficient and this IS NOT your marriage, but don't judge it, nonetheless.

Elly said...

Kay! Obviously, I was a bit sleepy, as I typed in the code 'thing' after my comment. Coffee FIRST, Eileen....Then type!!!!

Kate said...

Dear Anonymous,
I did say in my post that all bases are covered, and that includes Bubby and I's comfort and well-being too. We're very happy with our arrangement. My husband made VERY sure of this before returning to the bedroom.
I'm sure I've made myself clear, but you do remind me of a personal blog rule I've broken. I try to make it a habit not to discuss my family on my blog because that's not what this blog is for and for some reason, whenever bloggers discuss their husbands and children, it seems to be fodder for trolls to come in and be critical.
I have nothing to hide. My life is an open book to my family, friends and neighbors, but this is the internet and frankly, it's none of anyone's business. :)


Naomi said...

I wanted to thank you for sharing this part of your life. I find it refreshing. I love to hear and see other women putting their husbands in first place(behind their relationship with God.) It sounds to me like you have a wonderful hubby and I dont think that he would let you and the baby be uncomfortable(sp?). When my youngest was born I slept on the couch with the bassinett beside me. It was easier to get up and down and easier to get to everything that I needed. Thank you again for sharing. I hope that things are getting easier.