Saturday, August 12, 2017

Simplicity in Self-Grace

I used to pride myself on how much I could accomplish in one day.
I was going to be the mom who did it all.
And for a little while I was doing pretty well.

Then, I became ill.

One of those strange, undiagnosed illnesses women get and doctors scratch their heads over.
Is she really sick?  Is she just a busy mom?  Is it all in her head?
Likely, it is the result of years of high stress and hormone changes.

Now, where I had days of immense productivity, I have days of inactivity.
My brain and my body just won't cooperate and I need rest.
Peace, quiet.

In those moments, on those days, I need to give myself grace.
I cannot do it all.
Sometimes, I can't handle someone's postings on facebook and I have to block or delete them.
It's ok.
Sometimes, dinner is very simple.
It's still ok.
Many times we eat on paper plates so I have fewer dishes to wash.
I cringe because it is wasteful, but it is ok.
Sometimes, we just have days where it doesn't all work out.  It doesn't all come together.
Sometimes, we have do-over days, and throw-in-the-towel days.
We need time to rest and time to heal.
We need to throw off expectations and impressions and just be real.

For me, that is giving myself the grace to be ok with living small and simple.

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